Are you like me? Do you struggle to get out of bed sometimes, get stuck daydreaming, wondering about your future, or worrying about your past? I get it and it's hard. I've recently been listening to this podcast called "We Can Do Hard Things" which I will link at the bottom because it is amazing and helpful. Sometimes doing the simplest of things can be daunting for me, and cause me to procrastinate big time. Just this morning, I looked up, how to force yourself to shower. It had only been a two days but was the first thing on my list of to-do's this morning. What I found was astonishingly simple and helpful. As I laid there feeling comfortable in my bed, wanting to stay and sleep a little longer, I knew it didn't feel right. Not because sleeping in is bad, but because I wanted to get up and take care of myself. Sometimes I feel like there isn't even a reason for wanting to lounge in bed all day, it just happens. So with pride aside, I found a website that laid out step by step how to make it happen. It said, "turn on the water, that's it." It explained that sometimes when you have anxiety and other types of mental differences, it is hard to think about one task at a time. I started thinking about the whole day, what needs to be done, and worrying how taking time to shower may lessen my time for productivity. My grandmother, a therapist, told me about the spaghetti plate trick: each thought is a spaghetti on a plate and if we can take one off, and focus on that one, we can maybe get to the next and so on. So, that is what I did. I turned the shower on. Then it said, undress and you mine as well get in because it would take more effort to re-dress -- made sense. With my anxiety, I sometimes get so in my head that all I can focus on is my mind racing and my heart beating. Super fun. So, getting out of bed and taking a shower to me can sound like this: "I don't want to get up, should I sleep more? Am I going to feel terrible about how much sleep I did or didn't get? What's the weather? What do I wear? Do I have any instagram messages? Should I text this person back now or later? ....Even though it felt ridiculous, I asked (the internet) for help. I am learning that asking for help, even if it's googling something simple that I do almost every day, doesn't make me weak or stupid or incapable in anyway. I am so capable. I googled and I did it. I even made a healthy and delicious breakfast and had one of the best mornings I have had in a while. In the past I would have tried to will my way out of bed, felt shameful for asking or seeking any type of help that had to do with a simple task of self care, and probably stayed in bed for much longer. I never would have gotten to the coffee shop I'm sitting at, drinking my favorite peach tea, and writing this to you. It's not shameful to struggle, it's human. Whether seemingly big or little your struggles matter and you deserve every victory you can get.
From me to you, here's my two cents. Take it or leave it in the tip jar, I'm good either way.
As Glennon says, we can do hard things.
With love,
Ashley